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Great Sporting Quotes
Football.. .Mark Viduka I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league??
I'd like to play for an Italian club like Barcelona??
Noel O'Mahoney We'll be happy if we lose, it's on the same time as the beer festival??
George Hamilton He's pulling his captain off, he's pulling him off and it's not the first time??
When I said they'd scored two goals of course I meant one??
The Baggio brothers, of course, are not related??
Ron Atkinson They've picked their heads up off the groung and they now have a lot to carry on their shoulders??
Trevor Brooking That's football, they had several chances and did not score, England had no chances and scored twice??
Rugby..... Murray Mexted You don't like to see hooker's going down on players like that??
There's nothing that a tight forward likes more than a loosie right up his backside??
Ray Gravell You've got to get your tackle in early, even if it's late??
Darts...... Sid Waddell If you didn't know him, you wouldn't know who he was??
He takes on opponents like Desperate Dan used to eat Cow Pie??
Fordham looks like a hippo in a power shower?? He has more checkouts than Tesco's??
We wouldn't be more excited if Elvis walked in and asked for a chip butty??
Deller is like Long John Silver, he desperatly needs another leg??
That was like throwing 3 pickled onions into a thimble??
John Gwynne Each game is unique, and this one is no different to any other??
He didn't appear as cool as he looked??
Alan Warriner You are the weekest chink, goodbye??
Sex is an anti-climax after that??
Golf......... Peter Alliss The notice's are telling the players not to lick their balls on the green??
Greg Norman I owe a lot to my parents especially my mum and dad??
Sam Torrence If you'd offered me a 69 this morning i'd have been all over you??
Horse Racing... Kenny Maine Other than being castrated, things have gone quite well for this horse??
John Francombe The racecourse is as level as a billiard ball??
Nick Zito A lot of horses get distracted, it's just human nature??
Stewart Machin Tony McCoy has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees??
This is a really lovely horse, I once rode her mother??
Boxing.. Alan Minter Sure there has been injuries and deaths in boxing but none of them serious??
Frank Bruno That's cricket Harry, you get that in boxing??
It was a no win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost??
Marlon Starling I'll fight Lloyd Honeygan for nothing, if the price is right??
Harry Carpenter Minter, the undisputed World Champion, leaves the ring not a champion??
GAA...... Micheal 'O'Muircheartaigh He'll regret that to his dying day, if he lives that long??
Sean Og O'Hailpin, his father is from Fermanagh, his mother is from Fiji, neither a hurling stronghold??
Pat Spillane The first half was even, the second half was even worse??
Tony Scullion I never retired, they just stopped picking me??
Athletics.. David Coleman He won the bronzemedal in the 1976 Olypics so he is used to being in front??
The boy swims like a greyhound??
It was his fastest swim on American soil??
Stephen Roche In cycling you can put all your money on one horse??
Formula 1.. Murray Walker Prost can see Mansell in his earphones??
His tyre is only flat at the bottom??
Snooker.. John Pullman For those of you in Black and white it's behind the Yellow
Some weeks the lady is good looking and some weeks they're not. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi.
We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. I just can't figure out where else to play!
-- Pat Williams
I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.
-- Source Unknown
The sun doesn't shine on the same dog's butt every day but we sure didn't expect a total eclipse.
-- Steve Sloan
I'd run over my mother to win the Super Bowl.
-- Russ Grimm
It is how you show up at the showdown that counts.
-- Homer Norton
You gotta be a man to play baseball for a living, but you gotta have a lot of little boy in you, too.
- Roy Campanella
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